Anticipation Nerrrrrrves

Once we rock, we don't want to stop
Not today or tomorrow

The next three days are going to be terrible for me. No matter how many kitties I save from trees or old ladies I help across the street, I'm still going to be a blathering psycho who isn't worth much until about... oh... 10:30 am on Wednesday. Why?

Because that'll be right after our ultrasound appointment at the OB/GYN. To find out which gender this baby is. And I'm an awful waiter.

I'm not really one for patience. I would like to be. I would love to be. But I'm especially not when it comes to the big things - Christmas, trips to Disneyland, seeing my baby for the first time. I'm starting to wonder if there even is a baby in there, because...


Yesterday I had three people be astonished that I'm even pregnant at all. At 5 months along, typically there's something going on in the abdominal area that tips people off that there's some serious baby-growing happening. But, maybe these people are just used to seeing a fuller, rounder Holly in every day life. Or, maybe they were just trying to be polite and make me feel as though I'm going to one day pop out a healthy baby without a trace of additional inches.

It made me feel as if I'm not working hard enough. Or maybe I'm not eating enough. Or I have this weird misshapen body that is somehow getting rid of vital organs instead of just crowding them around a little. I've even felt the possibility that maybe the baby doesn't live there anymore, like the little kicks I've been feeling in my lower right abdomen are just traces of a previous tenant who has now moved on to fancier digs.

But, Wednesday wednesday wednesday. That's all I'm waiting for.

We're coming back for more
You know why?
'Cause we want you
You know we should be together