With or Without You

Looks like Saturday posting has become my thing. Not such a bad thing, but my thing nonetheless.

I am feeling amazing this morning. Even though I was freezing last night after watching a flag football game, even though my body decided to start practicing for the Big Show, even though I have a pretty full day ahead of me.... It's simply fascinating how outlook and perspective can change the most mundane and pedestrian things into something new and shiny.

*****

When we were engaged, Caleb kept a countdown to two things on his phone: our wedding day and the opening night for "Transformers." Every morning, when he would come to pick me up for work, he would say, "Good morning - 55 days until we get married and 325 days until Transformers" or whatever the count was for that particular day. Pretty often, I couldn't tell which he was more excited for. So, when the first of the two days came, I thought he would forget about the countdown to the movie - I mean, it was our wedding day! But the countdown continued. And when the second of the two days came, I tried to gauge how much excitement "Transformers" gave him; we got to the movie theater two hours before the movie started, we sat amongst the Nerdy and the Weirdies, he gasped at every new sight of each robot in disguise. It seemed like I might have been wrong - there was no way he could get more excited about something than about this all-encompassing movie.

And then we conceived a child. And we found a countdown for it.

Caleb often tells me how many more days there are until Jack's supposed arrival. It was fine when it was triple-digits. A little more pressure was added when it slid into doubles. And now that it's closing in on a month, I'm starting to consider taking it down altogether.

Because with our wedding day, it was either August 4th or bust. With "Transformers," our tickets were dated and verified.

But with a baby? The numbers may as well be "???????? days."

Because I read yesterday that only 5% of babies come on their due date. Because I am getting bombarded with birthing stories. Late late comers. Super early comers. In the middle of the night comers. In the middle of grocery shopping comers. Because no matter what I do, I can't make a personal invitation for my baby to come at any other time than when he's ready. 

So, I trust that those who know better than I do will be able to keep the situation under control while I can't.

And, for the record? I think Caleb's more excited about December 20th, 2008 than any other day in human history.